Maddie & Troy

At a house party, two friends get paired for a round of Seven Minutes in Heaven, only to use their time hiding in the cupboard to talk about love, queerness, and the quiet comfort of being truly seen.

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“Alright, party people, it’s nine o’clock, so you know what that means.” 

“Solitude and quiet contemplation about the Lord our Saviour Jesus H. Christ?” 

“...No, Sister Act. It’s time for Seven Minutes in Heaven.”

“Oh, not this game again. I told you, it’s never fun.”

“That’s because you’re no fun. Fran, back me up here?” 

“I’m not really in the mood to play it.” 

“You too, Judas? Come on, it will be fun.” 

“Better do as she says. Or else she won’t shut up about it for the rest of the night.”

“Fine, whatever, let’s play.” 

“Yay! Peer pressure wins again.” 

“So, who's playing?” 

“I will.” 

“Me too.” 

“Troy?…Troy?…Troy? Fine, ignore me then.” 

“What?” 

“God man, turn your fuckin’ hearing aids up.”

“You know they’re out of battery.”

“I SAID LET’S PLAY SEVEN MINUTES IN HEAVEN!!!”

“You don’t need to shout. I can lip-read just fine.”

“Do we have to play?”

“You don’t have to, but if you don’t, you'll be sitting awkwardly on your own while the rest of us are in Heaven.” 

“Fine by me. Can get to the end of this chapter.”

“Who brings a fuckin’ book to a party?” 

“People who like to read, duh.” 

“Right, so Yelena is being a boring fuck. Anyone else not getting in on Heaven? Speak now or forever hold your peace.” 

“No? No? Good. I’m gonna pair you off. Let’s see, Olive and Ron. June and Rodrigo. Matty and Sally. Me and Quentin, obvs. So that leaves Troy and Maddie. You two can be paired together, won’t that be fun?”

“Err… err… Uh... I...”

“Yes, such fun, Bianca. Let’s go, Troy. Into the airing cupboard. Now.” 

“Oh God, she’s keen. Fine, pop off, queen. You two can go first. The rest of us will make sure you are in there for the full seven.” 

“Oh, did you know Irene Adler is only in one Sherlock Holmes book?”

“No one gives a shit, Yelena. You’re only here because your mam and mine go hurdlin’ on the weekends.”

*****

“So… … …”     You doing alright, Troy? 

Yeah. Thanks for getting me out of there. How’re you holding up?

Not too bad. I was hoping to get Olive alone, but L’il Miss Cis-Hetronormative butted in. So, I'm probably gonna ask her out when we're done here. 

Yeah? Oh, best of luck. 

Thanks. 

Hey, can I ask you something? 

Of course.

Do you think I can try on your jacket?

Course you can. 

Thanks. Been eyeing it up all evening. It looks so cool. 

Got it from Oxfam for a tenner. Real leather, that. Try it on now. Actually, it might even help sell all this, you wearing some of my clothes. And of course… hold still. I need to just … there. Is my lipstick suitably smudged, too? 

Yeah. 

And have I got any on my teeth?

No. 

Shit. There. That should sell it. Looks like we've been properly at it. Now, how long have we been in here for? 

Um... Three minutes. 

Only three? Ugh. Does anyone actually think this is fun?

Bianca and Quentin? 

Maybe. 

So… Does Olive know you...?

Oh, yeah. I mean, we talked, obviously. And… I kissed her. At Matty's. And she kissed me back. But we’ve not… You know? I want us to be official. And how about you? What’s your plan for after the party? 

I want to go home. Watch a movie. Maybe will Skype Miguel. He… he said he wanted to come with me to Ian’s thingie next week. 

How long has it been? 

Six months. 

Oh, dead made up for you. I want to meet him. 

You will at Ian’s. He’s my “friend”. 

Does that ever get easier? 

……. I don’t know. For me and Miguel, yes. You see, I tell everyone that he and me are best friends. That bit's true. We just... also happen to have a romantic attraction to go with it.

That's really cute. Hmm... ... ... You know, in another universe, we're violently making out here. 

And that would be so very dull. 

Ha. Speaking of ... ... ... "MMM. WOW. TROY YOU ARE SUCH A GOOD KISSER.” 

Ha-ha-ha-ha. 

Shhh! Ha ha! Right… 45, 46, 47, 48. Thanks for the catch-up, mate. 53. 54. Wish me luck? 

Good luck, mate.

******

“That’s time! Let’s see if… Oooh, look, someone’s gotten busy! Troy, you absolute dog! Ha! See, what did I tell you? This game is so great at bringing people together.” 

“You have no idea, Bianca. Say, Olive, I could murder a drink from the kitchen. Care to chum me?”

"God, yes."

"But—you'll miss your turn in Heaven with Ron."

"I think we'll survive, won't we, Ron?"

"Aye, lass, means I can finish this conversation about Irene Alder. So you say she was only in one book? So why is she so often depicted?"

"You see, he's grand."

"And Maddie? We'll survive?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I think we will."